A small piece of my mind when I was twenty. Seems I had strong opinions even then. This is from an old letter I had written to a friend.
I'm scared of men, scared of people, scared of this world. Somedays I don't want to wake up to see the sun, because I'm scared of having to deal with it all. You have to make all these decisions, like whether to wear white socks or blue ones. Somedays I'd rather go bare foot then to have to decide. I guess thats a poor personality trait... People bombared you with questions, What are you doing with your life? Where are you going? Are you happy? What do you want from life? You know what I mean. Petty questions, people ask, not because they really care but because they want to compare your answers with theirs. Isn't that right?
It frustrates me, that people are so phony, walking around this planet earth with no reason to question why their walking in the first place. Did someone tell you to walk, or are you walking because you wanted to? Even that half of us can't really answer. Then you get older and you start to accept things, molding you thoughts to everyone elses. You start to mature and become normal.....and you become boring, robotic individuals.
So have I become my worst fear.........a boring, molded, robotic individual?
I'm scared of men, scared of people, scared of this world. Somedays I don't want to wake up to see the sun, because I'm scared of having to deal with it all. You have to make all these decisions, like whether to wear white socks or blue ones. Somedays I'd rather go bare foot then to have to decide. I guess thats a poor personality trait... People bombared you with questions, What are you doing with your life? Where are you going? Are you happy? What do you want from life? You know what I mean. Petty questions, people ask, not because they really care but because they want to compare your answers with theirs. Isn't that right?
It frustrates me, that people are so phony, walking around this planet earth with no reason to question why their walking in the first place. Did someone tell you to walk, or are you walking because you wanted to? Even that half of us can't really answer. Then you get older and you start to accept things, molding you thoughts to everyone elses. You start to mature and become normal.....and you become boring, robotic individuals.
So have I become my worst fear.........a boring, molded, robotic individual?
4 Comments:
Don't be too hard on yourself.
Some of the things that we do are not important enough to sweat about whether or not we are expressing our individuality.
However, I do truly believe that it is important that every individual does maintain at least a few things that they are passionate about. Things that they would not just 'follow the pack' on.
It is admireable to meet someone who is not afraid to express their own individuality or creativity, be true to their convictions, and remain passionate about the stuff that is important to them.
By
Anonymous, at 8:56 AM
Thanks for your comment.
Yes, I agree, it's not worth stressing over.
The important things in my life and my children's lives will always be influenced with a strong sence of myself.
By
Unknown, at 11:17 PM
We are are doing all this because we are humans. Animals would not spend 10 minutes wondering whether to wear blue or white socks. Human intelligence comes with advantages and disadvantages. But we must take whatever is best in us and live our lives as humanly as possible. I agree is not always easy, but even if our path has been initially chosen by our parents, aliens or god, because we've reached maturity it is our mission to lead us towards our own goal. Don't blame yourself for being human.
By
Ririnette, at 5:20 AM
Well spoken, Riri.
Thanks.
By
Unknown, at 12:54 AM
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